Honeymoon Planning and Excitement

Last night was very exciting. It’s a bank holiday this weekend so on Sunday night we stayed up a lot later than we usually would. Most evenings we are both so tired that we tend to just sit and watch television; often with him watching something I don’t like on TV and me watching Netflix on my laptop or sat blogging. We’re together but we’re not really. We like watching things together but we don’t have much that we both want to watch at the moment. I like Suits – he doesn’t, he likes House of Cards and Breaking Bad – I don’t (am I the only one in the world?). So we end up watching things separately.

Family on Holiday

But last night we sat down together and excitedly searched for apartments and hotels to stay at for our honeymoon. We spent hours finding the perfect places for us to stay in both Spain and Portugal and it made us so excited and happy thinking about our little family staying in these places and exploring these countries together. We pictured ourselves at the end of a busy day in the sunshine, on the little balcony with the wrought iron and the tiny table and chairs and the bottle of red wine, reminiscing about our day and the fun we’d had, and chatting about what Ava had got up to. We imagined how we’d buy some bread and chorizo and manchego and take it up to our little kitchen and enjoy a little feast together.

The thought of having a whole four weeks together, just us, with no worries of work or housework, and every day to just enjoy, explore, eat and drink and just be together and live it is just incredible. I am weighed down at the moment with how much I have to do; wedding planning and clearing and organising and improving our entire house and getting it ready to sell, as well as being a mother, a girlfriend, dealing with a lot of migraines and other health issues, and struggling with being able to sleep, and I don’t like to whinge, but like I’ve mentioned before recently – I’m struggling.

I’m happy, really I am – I’m just freaking exhausted and not feeling good. I’m so excited for our wedding day and an entire day celebrating with our loved ones. I can’t bloody wait. Thinking about our honeymoon as a family just makes me so delighted and it was really lovely spending a good few hours together picturing it all and planning our adventures. We ended up booking about five apartments and hotels, as well as the ferry over to Santander and it now just feels so much more real! I think it will be amazing for us, and I can’t wait.

The Twinkle Diaries

Wedding Invitations, Harvey Specter and Bunnies #LittleLoves

Oh it’s been another fun week of poorliness and blah. The boy came back from his stag do in Gdansk with a very bad throat after too much karaoke and beer but then that developed into an actual sore throat and cold which he then kindly gave to me. It’s not your usual bit-of-a-sore-throat though, oh no. We’ve both been in so much pain and I’ve felt really weird and not really here all week. And I am here; it’s the only place I’ve been. And I’ve been getting yet more migraines blah blah blah.

Anyway! On to this weeks #LittleLoves……

Read

A couple of weeks ago I started reading an actual book. Oh no wait, I’ve just remembered it was on my kindle so not an actual book, but I did buy a book. I haven’t picked either up since though so I don’t know why I keep buying them – but I love books!

I have read all of my to-do lists over and over again, and they’re not getting any shorter, and I’ve looked longingly at the magazines I continue to buy, despite never getting chance to read them. I clearly need a holiday and some sun-bed lounging.

Ooh ooh I’ve also read my wedding invitations, which I love, and they have now all gone out so I can share a picture with you…

Wedding Invitations Project PrettyProject Pretty Wedding Invitations

Watched

Suits! Harvey Specter is so darn ugly isn’t he?

Harvey SpecterSource

It’s really easy to watch (and not just because of the male and female eye candy), fast-paced and I love the characters and the banter between them. I am on Season three on Netflix and I don’t think this series is actually as enjoyable as the others but I still love it.

Wore

As usual I’m giving fashion bloggers a run for their money with my daily ensemble of leggings and baggy t-shirt. Watch out Sincerely Jules. Oh I did put on my sports gear one day as a step towards making myself exercise that day (didn’t happen).

Just do it

Ava has mostly been wearing her oldest and most basic clothes that still fit her because if I put her in something new and nice it comes back with paint or mud on it from nursery. It’s a bit of a pain at the moment because pretty much all of her clothes are brand new because of the season change so she’s mostly alternating between a couple of plain t-shirts from last year that still fit her and black leggings or jeans with her scruffy trainers! I really want to put her in her pretty summer clothes but I regret it every time I do (Sidenote: surely they use washable paints at nursery? – apparently not at ours!).

She has been wearing these little bunny-print leggings which I think are really cute. Her Dad asked what they were though, and if they had shrunk! #Wally

Ava and FlorenceStrike a pose

 Heard

Ava singing – a lot. It’s very cute, especially when she sings the words wrong and insists that it’s us that’s wrong! She’s also been role-playing with her toys a lot more again which I absolutely love listening to. Children’s imaginations astound me – they are so quick with their thoughts and the things they come out with are just brilliant.

Made

I think all I have made this week is the bed and our lunches. I have been meaning to make more raw chocolate all week and I also wanted to make the raw chocolate fudge and the raw chocolate mousse (I probably should stagger them a bit), but I just haven’t been able to summon up the energy even though they are easy and quick to make. I hate being poorly; I feel so useless.

And lastly…

Some inspiration from my new lover…

SuccessSource

Hope you are having a lovely week!

butwhymummywhy

Wedding Wednesday: Trying On My Dress, Flower Dilemmas and Cake

A couple of weeks ago I received a phone call to say that my actual wedding dress had arrived at the shop! I had been told after I ordered it that it would most likely be there only a couple of weeks before my wedding (I left wedding dress shopping quite late) and that they would still have plenty of time to make any alterations, but it was still going to be a little bit scary not having tried my actual dress on until that close to my wedding.

Wedding Wednesday Birds and Lilies

So I made an appointment at the shop, and went and tried my actual dress on for the first time! I was very nervous as I ordered a size down from what they measured me as I was planning on losing weight anyway (and I have) and also because the sample dress I tried was supposedly a size 8 and from my measurements they would have ordered me a 12. I didn’t want to have to pay hundreds of pounds for big alterations and also risk the dress changing a bit if loads had to be taken off it.

Ever since ordering my dress I have been pretty worried that when I came to try it on it just wouldn’t fit at all and I would be totally buggered. However it was actually too big! I am really relieved but also feel a bit annoyed as I could probably have done with another size down and then would have had to have (and pay for) less alterations. But hey ho. I can understand why they want you to size up as obviously it is easier to take in a dress rather than take it out, and also you could easily put on a bit of weight, but it’s still frustrating. I knew I wouldn’t put on any weight and would only lose it and now have to pay more money to have it altered. And also I am now a bit worried that it won’t look the same on me once it does fit better and that it will sit differently on my body. But I guess I just have to wait and see now!

Elsewhere, planning has actually been going a lot better these past couple of weeks. I have gone from having so much to do and being quite stressed about it, to having got almost all of the biggest things done plus some smaller bits.

Invitations are finally sorted and we are very happy with them. All but a few have gone out which is a HUGE relief, and as we like the design and the colour fits well with our theme we will most likely be getting our table numbers and table plan from the same company. So they just need ordering when we are ready.

Our favours and place names are almost sorted – we know who is doing them for us – the details just need to be finalised and we are happy with them. We have also ordered our wedding cake.

There are a couple of bigger things that are still left to do; one of which is flowers which I am struggling with. We have had a quote for what I wanted – which I thought was quite simple and mostly using cheaper flowers – but it is going to cost quite a bit more than I thought unless I change loads, and even then it seems a lot for what we would be getting. So much so that I have been considering doing the majority of them myself, which is a bit scary. I would still get my bouquet and a couple of other bits made, but I feel like what I want is so simple for a lot of the flowers that it would probably be totally doable to do them ourselves. However, I really don’t know a great deal about flowers and what if I couldn’t get what I wanted at the time or couldn’t get them to look good? I wish we lived somewhere like London so we had lots of great flower markets we could go to, but I am not sure of anywhere like that around here. I really want to have a little practice but there isn’t loads of time to do that and make a decision and then still get someone to do them for us if that’s what we decide to do. Eeek I don’t know what to do!

We still have to get bridesmaids dresses which I am not really worried about as we will just be getting them from the high-street so there are lots of possibilities; I am just waiting a bit longer to try and find the perfect one before I compromise slightly. And the boy hasn’t sorted his suits out yet but that’s easy enough too and I am leaving that to him.

Other than that it is mostly just buying some bits for decorating the venue that is left to do and making a few decisions about music and readings, and creating a playlist for the DJ.

I feel a lot better about where we are now; the invitations being done are a huge weight off my mind, but the flower situation is bothering me a lot as I just don’t know what to do for the best.

Please let me know if you have any suggestions for what to do about flowers, or if you did your own how easy it was and if you would do it again – I need all the help I can get!

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The Happy List #3

The Happy List No.3

This last week I have been feeling a little bit low. Ava now goes to nursery for two and a half days a week so on those three days I have to get up really early – which would be fine if I could actually sleep at night, but I struggle massively with it and so I am more exhausted than usual. I have also been getting really bad migraines again for a few weeks now and they are so frequent and so painful and it’s bringing me down. I seem to get them in stages; so I’ll get them for a while and then barely get any, but this time it is so much worse and they are lasting ages and are too painful to just deal with and carry on as normal. I can’t think of anything that has changed in the last few weeks so then I of course worry that something is wrong!

But I have been to the doctors loads of times in the past and tried all sorts of medication, none of which helped, and I have also had a brain scan too a few years ago and everything was fine. So I try not to worry, but it’s hard. It’s especially hard because I have more than ever to do right now but some of these migraines have been so bad that they have taken me out for the entire day.

The boy has gone on his stag do to Poland this week which is perfect timing of course, and Ava is being rather difficult at the moment, so I am just wanting these few days to pass by quickly so I can get some sleep and hopefully feel better.

This year is a good and exciting year, and I know how lucky I am, but it’s always good to stop and remember what you have to be grateful for; so here is my happy list!

1. We are getting married in 66 days!!! Actually, that is more scary that happy-making right now but still, I’m excited! The thought of being somewhere with all my family and friends and knowing that they are all there for us is just incredible, and I can’t imagine what it will feel like!

2. We are going on an amazing month long trip to Spain and Portugal with our daughter after our wedding. Sunshine, Chorizo, Manchego, Rioja, sand, relaxation, adventures and all with my little family – what could be better than that?!

3. I found out some brilliant news about a close family member today. I didn’t actually know there was possibly going to be any bad news but now I know that it is good news, I am so relieved and happy. It is these kind of moments in our life that remind us how lucky we are and how we should live life to the full and tell our family we love them. #Grateful

Sometimes.Source

4. It is going to be June in a couple of weeks and so the sun will be coming out for longer periods soon won’t it? It’s got to surely?! Sunshine makes me very happy and I am very (im)patiently waiting for it to come back.

5. I tried on my actual wedding dress last week (rather than the sample) and I could get in it! In fact it was rather too big, but as I had ordered a size down to what the shop recommended I was worried I wouldn’t be able to actually get into it. But I could! I think I could have ordered a size down and had less alterations to pay for but never mind. It was exciting putting on the actual dress I will get married in!

What’s making you happy this week?

Share the Joy linky at bodfortea.co.uk

Three Year Olds Can Be Quite Difficult, Actually.

I didn’t think having a three year old would be easy, of course. But on turning three years old my little one seemed to suddenly grow up quite a bit and became a little girl as opposed to a toddler. After the rather challenging ‘terrible two’s’ I enjoyed having proper conversations with her, and her being able to do more things for herself. But my goodness, three year olds can be difficult.

Three Year Old Ava

I have found this last couple of weeks quite stressful with her and I keep shouting. Too much. I don’t like it at all; she’s three after all. A lovely little young girl just trying to find her way in the world with an impatient mummy who yells too much right now. I’m struggling. She just won’t listen to me and I can repeat something over and over again and then eventually when I’ve got up close to her and said it for the seventh time, she’ll say “yeah?”, like a question, like I’ve just said her name for the first time, like I literally haven’t been speaking to her for the last sixty seconds (it would at least be slightly better if she said “yes”). It’s the most frustrating thing in the world. It’s like I don’t exist. And it makes me so cross; I have a short temper which I’m not proud of but I struggle to control it when she is like this. I’m just so tired and tired of her being like this.

It’s like she has gone from a more grown-up little girl who is nice and polite and fun to be with, to this little monster who thinks she can do what she wants and does do what she wants. I know she is probably just testing her boundaries and being a typical little person, but the way she completely blanks me like I have not said a word is so hard to take. It’s been so bad that I have actually questioned whether there is suddenly something wrong with her hearing. It has been that bad. But I don’t think there is; she mainly does it just with me. Maybe she has just learnt to switch off from me. I don’t blame her to be honest.

I thought it would get better once she started nursery – that having other people regularly disciplining her and asking her to do things and having to listen to others would help her behaviour at home. I thought that not having the carers full attention constantly and having to share their attention would help. But actually it’s made it worse. Maybe because she has to fight for attention or at least share it at nursery she thinks I should be at her beck and call at home.

It might sound like I am making a big deal out of nothing and I know it could be worse; she could be going round hitting people or swearing like a sailor, and I am grateful for that. But it is really affecting me at the moment. The majority of the time I have to stop what I’m doing, go over to her and sit in front of her and speak to her and even then if she has something to say she may just talk over me. I was enjoying being able to ask her to go to the loo before we go out or to put her toys away or get dressed, but she just ignores me now or has a HUGE mardy and won’t move.

I am sure it is just a stage in the growing up process, and that soon I will have my lovely little polite, friendly and nice girl back, but meanwhile she is pushing me to my limits. I am trying my best not to yell at her, I really am. But it’s hard. I think I need to do more yoga.

Three year olds are difficult.

Linking up with PoCoLo.