You have a baby.
You start getting used to changing nappies and feeding 24/7.
You start to get in some kind of routine…..
You have to start feeding them actual food.
They start to crawl.
They grow teeth that you have to clean. You add that to your routine and start to get used to it….
They start to walk. Now no-where is safe. You get used to that….
They start to climb.
They can reach higher drawers.
They start copying what you are doing and saying. You can’t swear anymore. Or listen to Jay-Z.
They enter a new clingy stage. And you CAN’T LEAVE THE ROOM. Or go to the loo. EVER.
They can reach door handles. Now you can’t even shut them in a room, I mean, ahem, shut them in a room with you obbbvvvviously.
They can also shut you out of rooms, saying “bye” to you as they trap their fingers.
They can take off their clothes, open gates, climb out of their highchair, run rather fast (away from you). It’s only a matter of time before they figure out how to take off their own nappy. I.Can’t.Wait.
I don’t even want to think about all of the new challenges that lay ahead. So don’t tell me. Please.