Today was one of those days. You know the kind. When everything goes wrong and you can’t seem to shake off the funk.
I hadn’t realised how much of a difference Ava going to nursery had made to me. I had been busy with wedding planning and everything else for so long that I was overwhelmed with too much to do and not enough time to relax. And so it went from no break from mothering to being stupidly busy but with Ava at nursery, and so I didn’t see a difference. But this week, after the wedding, after the mini-moon to London when things have returned to some kind of normality I have a little one with me constantly. And I’d actually forgotten what that was like.
Since April Ava has gone to nursery for two and a half days a week. Those days have been my time to get things done, and it’s been great. She needed the time with kids her age, and the discipline from those other than her parents, and I needed the time on my own, the time to get things done and to be someone other than mum regularly.
But this week, the first week of the summer holidays has reminded me how I regularly used to feel. Those days where I have loads of things to do at home, and a difficult little girl wanting my attention constantly at the same time as not listening to a word I say. I have got very little sleep the last two nights, and that little girl of mine is hard work right now. She doesn’t listen, she hates every dinner we make, she wants to wrap string around the cats necks and take them for walks and is just generally very difficult. I think we’re probably both missing that time away from each other and this is just the first week of the school holidays!
I have no patience and I’ve been too shouty. So has she. At 3pm I was still trying to get my lunch when I knocked a pan into a glass and it went flying across the kitchen. That nearly made me cry. I just wanted to eat.
It’s always a shame when we quickly forget how hard something was as soon as it changes and we’re used to the new way, so we stop appreciating it. I love my girl so much of course, but we both need that time away from each other, and I’d forgotten what a difference it makes. Today was a bad day mainly due to a lack of sleep, but it was a good reminder to appreciate it when things have got better.
Luckily for me we are going away in a few weeks so we will have sunshine on our skin and plenty to do for an entire month. Of course before that we have a couple of weeks in which we need to get out together even if it rains and break our days up.
What does everyone else do with young children during the school holidays, especially when the weather is rubbish? How do you get anything done? Actually I know that already so could you please share your fail-proof ways to get a good nights sleep even when your three year old keeps waking up screaming, or how to stop yourself from going crazy when you have a three year old at home every day and sh*t loads to do. Help, please.