I absolutely loved my friend Zara’s post on why she is totally rocking motherhood. She’s an awesome mum; very confident, open, and a lot of fun – they are three very lucky girls. Oh and the food she makes! (check out her Instagram to see) I have asked her before if she would consider adopting me but she didn’t seem too up for it to be honest. The sod!
She tagged me to write my own ten reasons why I’m totally rocking motherhood, and I found it pretty hard to be honest. Many parts of motherhood haven’t really come easily to me, despite thinking that it all would. I’m still working on my patience when I’m very tired (although that’s the same for everyone I’m sure), I flipping hate the school run and I’m sure it will always be a mad rush in the mornings, even when she’s started secondary school. I shout, I don’t play with her enough, and her uniform is often not ironed. Also, right now I have completely and utterly lost her PE kit except for the bag and her plimsolls. They have disappeared off the face of the earth and I am contemplating buying new ones. I think I put them somewhere safe so I didn’t forget…
But, I also know that I love her dearly and would do anything for her, and I think she knows that too. I have written a similar post before (I Am a Good Mum), but this takes it a bit further, and I really enjoyed writing it. So, here they are, my 10 reasons why I am totally bossing this mum thing.
10 Reasons Why I’m Totally #RockingMotherhood
- I love her with all of my heart. I tell her every day without fail, and she tells me the same. I think that’s important, and I want her to know how very loved she is. I don’t think it can be said too much, and she seems to agree (for now at least!). We have little bits we say – it started off with me saying that I “love her to the moon and back”, and she’s expanded it to say ” I love you to the moon and back and moon and back, and to the stars, and each and every cloud, and back again”. Sometimes it goes on for a lot longer than that. I love it.
- She has seen me cry and I’m totally ok with that. I want her to see that I can be vulnerable. It often comes naturally as a parent to hide our upset from our children, but I think it’s important for them to see it sometimes. For them to see that we are human too, and that it’s okay to show your emotions. As someone who has been made to feel crap for crying and being too emotional, I want to make sure that she never feels that way. She should know that I can be a strong mama bear, but also break down sometimes, and that after I have got it all out, I can pick myself back up again and carry on.
- We have fun together. As an adult it’s sometimes so hard to just forget all the shitty bad stuff in our lives, and let it overwhelm us and affect other things. And sometimes I need her to remind me of that. And she does. At those times I drop everything and forget everything else for a moment, and we put on some music and dance about together, or chase each other round the house and have a tickle fight. Or we take the mickey out of each other – she likes to say I’m the stinkiest, even though she’s as stinky as a pig, she likes to ‘shake her bum bum at her mum mum’ and burst out laughing. They are my favourite moments, and I think they are hers too.
- I don’t let her have whatever she wants all the time, whether that’s a new toy, or some more chocolate (except for cuddles). I love buying her things and I think it’s okay to spoil them a bit sometimes, and it’s hard having to deal with a tantrum especially whilst you are out in public or super tired. But she needs to be told no sometimes; she needs to know that she cannot have everything she wants in life, and that sometimes life is hard (especially when your mother doesn’t let you have another cuddly toy at IKEA). I don’t want her to be entitled, or selfish, and I don’t want her to think she can get what she wants by having a mardy. She keeps testing this theory though.
- I make sure she eats as well as possible. She’s incredibly fussy at the moment and it’s hard to get her to eat the things she should have every day. But I still keep trying, and she has a healthy home-cooked meal every night (except for the odd night out of course) so that I know she is at least getting a bit of veg every day. I care about what she eats and that she has a healthy appetite and isn’t constantly full of sugar. I want her to live a healthy life. We also sit down together at the dining table to eat almost every night – she has started grumbling about it more and more, but I think it’s important and gives her the chance to chat to us without any distractions.
- She can talk to me. My mum always made it so that we could go to her with anything, and I was very comfortable discussing things with her. I want Ava to know that she can always talk to me about anything, and I will listen without judging. She can come to me for advice about anything and I will be honest and open with her about things. I make sure she knows this.
- I encourage her to learn new things and improve on skills she already has, but I want her to do things at her own pace especially at this age when she is still getting to used to five full days at school. I won’t force her to take part in any clubs or sports she doesn’t want to do or force her to keep going to something if she doesn’t want to. And I give her lots of praise when she does something well.
- My daughter is really polite; something that is very important to me and that I am very proud of. People always comment on her lovely manners, just like people did to my mum when I was little, and I always remember it. I think manners are so important and it is something I taught her from an early age, and encouraged until it (mostly) became second nature to her.
- I can do handstands and cartwheels. Enough said.
- My children can be whatever they want to be. They can dress up as princesses and play with lego and trucks and My Little Pony’s and play football and ballet and become a nurse or a lorry driver or a stay-at-home parent or a chef (or a blogger – yikes!), and I will encourage and support them and allow them to be their true selves and be open and welcoming to all types of people.
Thanks for tagging me Z! I’d love to see Kerry at Noah and the Girls, Morgana at Coffee, Work, Sleep, Repeat, Zoe at My Little Wildings share their ten reasons they are rocking motherhood, as well as Kip Hakes‘ ten reasons he is rocking fatherhood!